FAQ
How long will it take?
Three days. Maybe more. They're desperately trying to figure out what's going on.
Why Venmo "for pizza"?
Next question.
Can I leave a testimonial?
Sure. You'll get about four words in.
Got it! 🎉
A really nice salesman is on his way. You'll like him. You'll never see him again. Then the guys show up.
(This form sends nothing. It's a parody. Nobody is coming.)